Complicated Conundrums

if I said I was angry I’d be lying because I’m fucking pissed

Being an adult child

I’m 23.  I have a BA.  I’m fairly independent.  I respect my parents.  I do almost anything they ask.  I’m not very independent.  I don’t own a car so I drive my dad’s truck.  I only work part-time so I live with my parents.  I sleep in the same room that has been mine since the day I came home from the hospital.  I respect my parents.  I do almost anything they ask.  Yes I know I repeated myself.

I am an adult.  I try my best to make ends meet, but sometimes I’m late with my loan payments.  I don’t have very many friends where I live.  I went to college and grew apart from my friends and I never figured out how to fix that.  I started becoming friends with someone and my parents hate it.  This friend is older than me and my parents think he wants to be more than friends.  Basically they won’t let me spend time with him.  Am I supposed to go to work and come straight home and just spend time with my family.  I love my family and I like spending time with them, but I can only handle so much.  I just want to have someone who I can hang out with and have fun.  Sitting in this house drives me crazy.  

Things are going to get ugly, because I’m about to stand up for myself and proclaim that I am an adult and I can be friends with anyone I want. Guess it’s time to find a place to live.

I am so sick of this bullshit.  Let me be my own person.  If I’m going to make mistakes, let me make them.  Stop trying to make decisions for me.

Update to yesterday’s self-talk

AOGANGOAIGOAHEGA’KDGVMA;OVIAEIOADVADLK;FHWAOEIU0Q3RFADSVLKJ

That’s how I feel on the inside.  The last 30ish hours have been so frickin awesome.

Alright Wagner, you know this a bad idea so why are you doing it….again?